In this week’s podcast episode, Lorissa and Sterling talk about this concept of a Sacred Self-Image and how we’ll be teaching Catholic moms not only how to cultivate a sacred self-image but how to teach their kids to do the same!
RESOURCES MENTIONED ON THE SHOW
TRANSCRIPT OF THE SHOW
Sterling: (00:04) Welcome to the Made for Greatness podcast. If you are listening to this in real time, you are in the middle of the Christmas season, in that week in between Christmas and New Year’s. And today I am here, my trusty partner, Lorissa, and we have something very interesting to share with you, a concept that we have been learning about for the last six months, and we are so excited to finally share it with you.
Lorissa: (00:35) Yes, hi Sterling. And Merry Christmas my friend. Yes,
Sterling: (00:40) Yes. We made it, we made it mom’s. Yeah, we made it to the, I told my husband, I said, I just love how I feel the day after Christmas. And he said, why is that? And I’m like, I don’t know. I just like set it all down and I know everything is done. And I just said, I really enjoy just kind of the, the freedom and the peace that comes on that day.
Lorissa: (00:59) Yeah. Just kind of settling in and just enjoying the blessings.
Sterling: (01:04) Sterling: (01:54) Sterling: (02:50) Sterling: (03:45) Sterling: (04:40) Sterling: (05:41) Lorissa: (06:43) Lorissa: (07:43) Lorissa: (08:42) Lorissa: (10:07) And I’m so excited that we’re doing this. Sterling: (10:09) Sterling: (11:08) Sterling: (11:57) Sterling: (12:52) Lorissa: (14:11) Yeah, I love that Sterling: (14:13) That’s what I’m gonna do. So, Lorissa: (14:17) Lorissa: (15:12) Lorissa: (16:03) And then every week there are two challenges. Tell us about the challenges. Lorissa: (23:12) Sterling: (23:38) Yeah, it’s, Lorissa: (23:41) I dunno, it’s really tell people what they’re, Sterling: (23:43) Lorissa: (24:58) Sterling: (25:59) Yeah. Lorissa: (25:59) Sterling: (26:49) Yeah. Lorissa: (26:50) Sterling: (27:45) Lorissa: (29:11) Yeah, absolutely. Sterling: (29:15) Lorissa: (30:18) God bless.
Yeah. Yeah. Watching the kids play, it’s so great. And so today we wanna tell you about what’s coming in Masters. If you’ve been following along with the podcast, you know that we switched to a quarterly format in the membership. So we used to have a theme every month, and we’ve switched to a quarterly theme. And what we love about that and what we’ve heard from our members is that it’s really nice to spend three months learning something to really go deeper, to practice it, to keep talking about it, and then really to see how life shows up and how we can use those tools. So for the last quarter, we’ve been focusing on cultivating peace in our lives. And it was just such a powerful program. And anytime you hear us talk about a program, if you join in the future, you can still access that program.
So you can go through our amazing prepared The Way program, if you’re feeling called to cultivate more peace in your life. But we wanted to introduce the new quarterly theme and tell you a little bit about this concept of self-image. So in the first quarter of the year, January, February, March, we’re going to be focusing on creating a sacred self image. And so I think when you hear the term self-image, particularly on the internet, a lot of times we worry, which is appropriate as Catholics, that we don’t wanna elevate ourselves. We don’t wanna be obsessed with ourselves. We don’t wanna only think of ourselves. And so a lot of you, when you hear the term self-image might just close the door on whatever that is, whoever said that,
But to explore this concept that your self-image is what you believe about yourself. So do you that you were made in the image and likeness of God, right? That’s something that a lot of us would say that we believe, we know that that’s a tenant of our faith, that we were made in the image and likeness of God. And yet we know that a lot of us don’t really deeply believe that because of the way that we live. We don’t treat ourselves as if we were made in the in or likeness of God. When you look at yourself in the mirror, what do you say to yourself? Do you say, oh my gosh, you look tired, you look old, look at those wrinkles. You didn’t get any sleep. You’re so frumpy. My brain likes to tell me that I’m frumpy. Like, where did that word come from?
I don’t even know, but that shows me, right? What we say to ourselves in the mirror shows you what your real self image is, shows you what you think about yourself. And so one of the things that we’ve been learning, we’ve been learning about how the brain thinks about itself. And another really interesting concept behind how the brain thinks about itself is the fact that when we try to stretch our self image, when we try to change it, it’s really resistant to that. And I think a lot of you have had experience with this where you try to become a person who likes exercise or become a person who manages their money well, or to become a fun mom. And so let’s say it was to become a fun mom, your brain has this idea that you’re not a fun mom and you decide, oh, I I want to be a fun mom.
I want to change that self-identity that I have. Okay? And so maybe you start doing more fun things with the kids, but then your brain who doesn’t like change will want to snap you back to the old self-image you can feel. All of us have experienced that. We make a little bit of progress, and then it literally feels like snap, like we snap back to the other level. And we will tell you that as you begin to understand this concept, that you have a self-image in every area of your life. So you have a self-image of yourself as a wife and as a mom, and as someone who does or does not exercise with your money, all areas in your life, you have a self-image already. And if you wanna change it, there are some very specific steps that you need to change and take in order to make it so that you don’t snap back to the old level.
And when Lorissa and I heard this, I don’t know, what was it like six months ago, we were like, oh my goodness, that is so interesting. We have got to learn more about this, and then we’re gonna teach them about this. So we have been learning and practicing this, leading up to this, this program. And that is what we want to teach you. We wanna teach you how at the brain level to change your self-identity so that you create a sacred self-identity. Not one of the world, not a materialistic one, but one that is rooted in biblical language. And I think most of us, we read the Bible and we kind of know that there’s something there we’re like, oh, I should probably think better about myself. But if you’re struggling to actually feel that way, we know exactly why. And that is what we are going to be teaching the women in Masters for the first quarter. So Lorissa, tell me, tell me a little bit about your thoughts about what we’ve been learning.
You know, I’m so excited about this quarter. I wanna say that, the last quarter that we did in peace was probably one of the most life-changing for me personally, because it really has helped me to truly step into a new, almost like a new version. I kind of like when we’re talking about the identity of being a woman who is centered in peace, like in God’s peace and wanting to like to walk in that. And I’ve really leaned into that. So that’s been so powerful. But I think as we head into the first quarter of 2023, this work that we can do on our self-image in, in really getting, having some awareness possibly around what is the self-image that we might have of ourselves. Because a lot of times some of the beliefs and the thoughts we have about ourselves are like, we have to peel back layers a little bit.
And so we have to do some of this work to actually peel back and to see the things that we’re, the way we’re talking to ourselves, the things that we’re saying to ourselves and how that impacts how we feel about ourselves, and then how we show up. And so, you know, over the last few years, I feel like I’ve been having a lot more self-awareness around this and seeing particularly some of the negative self-talk that I’ve, that I used to speak to myself with in the past and how those, that negative self-talk was really shaping my self-identity. And it was causing me to feel really in a lot of ways very terrible about myself. And then it, it, it just started to affect every aspect of my life. And I think that’s what I realized is that our self-image, the way we see ourselves, really impacts every aspect of our life.
Like you said, we have a self-image of ourselves as wives, as mothers, as the daughters of the king, as you know, so many things: the way we look, our gifts and our talents, how we view ourselves. And so for us to have to be able to walk together, I think as women who desire the same thing, which is really like we desire to be saints. We desire to walk in holiness. And I think at the heart of that is really understanding who God is and who he made us to be. And when we can, when we can start to settle in and start believing that we are who God said we are, then we end up showing up differently. And so I think not only for ourselves is this some of the most important work we can do, but I think for, for us as mothers modeling this for our children modeling this for our friends, our family members, our mothers, our sisters, other women at church, having like, and having and truly embracing a sacred self-image and really understanding what that means and doing the work to, to live from that place, I think it can be really powerful.
Yeah, I love that you said that because that is true. Sometimes I catch my oldest daughter and she’ll say something about herself that’s just a little self-deprecating, just like a little kind of putting herself down. And it is just really important to me that I teach my children how to speak kindly to themselves about themselves in their mind. And we don’t talk about that with children. We don’t say, do you know how there’s words in your mind and that you can believe some of them, or you can not believe some of them and, and change them and believe things on purpose. And I just, a big goal for me as a mom is to teach the kids this idea that they get to, that they choose their own self images, who, who plant whatever thoughts they’re gonna have and that they can change that.
And I really, I don’t know that children could understand this, but you guys can, I want you to know how uncomfortable it is to change it because you’re gonna feel uncomfortable and that’s how you know it’s working, where your body will go, oh no, I wanna, I wanna believe the old thing. And you have to go, I know brain. Well, we’re going to this other place, we’re trying to have sacred thoughts now, sainthood thoughts now and then it feels uncomfortable. And we’re gonna do that together. And one of the things that’s so powerful about doing this work in a community is everybody shares their experience. They share, oh, I tried that this week and it worked really well, but it’s also just as helpful to hear someone say, I tried it and it didn’t work really well. Here’s what came up. And then we all discuss it and it’s so beautiful.
And Lorissa’s not wrong. I grew so much through that program. We do this work, we don’t just teach this work. We usually learn it first, but then we take the classes with everyone. We’re also practicing those skills. And so we’re gonna teach you not only how to have a better self-image about your body, but also any other attribute that you want to change. Because there are a lot of, for example some of you might have a self-image that you’re not good at making friends. Like you just think, oh, I’m not making, I’m not good at making friends. And you think that that’s genetically true. If we opened you up, we’d be like, oh, there’s the, she’s bad at making friends Jean, she has it right. But once you learn this work, you’ll be able to just identify what you think about yourself.
Most of you don’t consciously know. Most of you are unconsciously living out what you believe about yourself. And so when you’re forced to even ask the question, what is my identity around this role that I have? Then you can kind of bring that up and ask yourself, do I wanna keep this identity or not? Because some of you have identities that you really like. For example, I have a self-identity that I’m Catholic. I probably don’t need to work on that. I just believe it and I act accordingly. But I’ll tell you, one of the things I’m gonna be working on in the first quarter is to really become a person who wants to move my body. Right now I have a self-identity that I don’t like to exercise. It’s deep. I’m pretty sure there’s a gene in there, you guys, it’s like Sterling does not like exercise . But I want to, I wanna use these tools and I know it’s possible to change it. And it doesn’t mean that I have to go run, you know, a 5K or a marathon or sign up for something extreme. I know I’m not gonna do that, but I wanna be someone who wants to move my body every day. And I want a new self-identity that says, when I don’t move my body, I feel weird. I feel uncomfortable because my new self-identity is someone who moves her body every day.
Oh no, I was gonna say, I think it, I think it’s fun right now as we kind of look to the new year to be thinking about some of those things to be thinking about. Mm-Hmm. What do you know? Because really we create our identity based on the thoughts that we have about ourselves. And so often, so many of, so much of our current identity especially some things that maybe we’ve, we’ve grasped onto, like you just said, like, I don’t think I’m good at making friends or, you know, I used to have this identity that I’m a terrible cook and I just, I can’t cook, I can’t make anything that’s taste good or whatever. And those are kind of surface level ones. We all have even deeper, deeper rooted ones. And maybe it was something that was told to us as a child and we grabbed onto it and we started to repeat that thought over and over in our head and we started to believe it because that’s really what a belief is.
It’s just a thought we’ve had over and over enough times and our brain seems to find some sort of proof for it, and then we end up just holding onto it and actually claiming it as part of our identity. And so it is hard, you know, to shift out of, but I think it’s exciting to be thinking about if you are thinking, if you are one of our members and you’re listening to this, I want you to be thinking about what are some of those things, just like what Sterling said that you might wanna work on going into this first quarter. And if you’re not yet a masters, I wanna invite you to really come and join us, even if it’s just for a quarter mm-hmm. to do this work. I wanna say as we kind of wrap this segment up, you know, I’ve worked with teenagers for the last 25 years mm-hmm. ,
And I’ve been reading some surveys and studies lately, kind of post covid of where young people are at, at least in the United States. And self-esteem, self-worth is at its all time low. Yeah. And so much of it’s connected to social media obviously what young people went through with Covid and maybe some isolation and, and all of that. But, you know, we are at a pivotal time in that the work that we’re gonna be doing this quarter I think is so important for us as mothers. But this is like, I wish that I would have learned this when I was a teenager or a young adult. Hmm. And so I think the thing that gives me hope is empowering mothers with the tools to model this for their kids. Having a sacred self-image, loving themselves and seeing themselves as a gift from God and modeling that truly in their lives.
Yeah. Yeah. And this is the part that I really like, kind of makes it a lot more fun. So, and a little bit I guess challenging. I mean cuz it’s a challenge. You gotta have a, we have to have a little bit of a challenge into this. So each week there’s gonna be a fit challenge and a holy challenge. So something in, in line with our health, it’s kind of just like a, a level up challenge and then something spiritually. So
Yeah, we’re not gonna tell you. That’s because it’s a surprise and then we unveil them and people just like get really excited. This is a really fun thing. The energy of the group is really fun. Everyone cheers each other on and we really encourage people to post about what they’re doing. And so we now have a Slack group instead of a Facebook group, so they’ll be posting it there. But I was just looking at some of the past challenges and trying to pull out just some testimonials and there were just so many, I mean, the women just become friends cuz even in later years when you just had hundreds of people join, there were so many friendships that were formed and, and women really lifting each other up and cheering each other on. And, and that’s, that’s really what it’s going to be. And so we’re going to be focusing on this sacred self image for the whole first quarter. It is a beautiful, stunning, life-changing program. Definitely something that you’re gonna wanna model for your kids. And we thought there’s no better way to start and really teach people about their self-identity. But then, really having us grow in health and in holiness with a fit challenge and a holy challenge. And so that is what we will be doing in January.
Yes. And I know, you know, January’s typically that time of the year where we all set our goals for the year. I know you’re big on this Sterling for me and my family, every year at the beginning of the year, we look, we reflect back on our goals from the past year and then we write goals. It’s really fun with the little ones to even like to see what their goals are and our kids’ goals. You know, they have goals for how well they’re gonna do in school or athletics, their home life, their spiritual life. We kind of cover all of those areas. But the thing that I’m learning so much about goal setting is it’s very easy to set a goal, even if it’s a big goal. It’s like, kind of like down the road. It’s something that we want to attain. It’s fun to kind of dream about it and dream about getting there, but we rarely ever take the time to say, okay, this is the goal I wanna get to. How am I actually gonna do it?
And it’s the actual, how am I gonna do it? The only way we’re gonna do it is by creating habits that lead us there. And this I think is why so many people never reach their goals. They think about it one or two days in January and then they put it on the shelf and they come back to it at the end of the year because they actually said, okay, well this is what I want. And it’s fun to dream about it, but they don’t actually say, well what is it gonna take to actually get me there? What do I need to do? What are the steps? How do I need to show up every single day to actually reach that goal? And so much of that requires not only setting very specific habits into place, but it does require a shift in your identity.
Because if you are someone that says, I wanna lose 30 pounds, you could say that, but you’re gonna actually have to sit down and go, well what is it gonna actually take? How do I, what do I need to do every single day? How do I need to show up? How do I need to think of myself? How do I need to believe in myself? And what kind of identity, like identity do I need to have to be a woman that is healthy and who exercises and eats well and loses weight? So this is what, you know, fit and holy brings to us is just kind of like teaching us how to set some of these habits into motion. And the really cool thing is, it’s just, it is just doing that and using our brain and thought work to be successful at it. And if you can do it with these things that we’re doing in fit and holy, you can apply it to anything in your life that you wanna do. Yeah.
Yeah. I love that. And then, you know, one of the fun things is that you are keeping track of your points every day. You’re kind of checking off these things and at the end of the week you can submit your points and we give really beautiful Catholic prizes so it just has an extra kind of game feel to it. And you know, moms, I think you need a little more fun in your life. I think you need a little more fun, a little more sparkliness. And that is exactly what this challenge does. So the challenge officially begins on January 1st, which is a Sunday. Okay. Which means you will get your fit, ho fit challenge and your holy challenge before. But Sunday is the first day that we count. So you definitely wanna be signed up before Sunday, January 1st, and then we have our kickoff call Monday, January 2nd. So a lot of you are fit and holy veterans, you’re ready. You know you’re gonna sign up and it’s gonna be so fun. If you’ve never heard that before, I just wanna invite you to come join us not only for this fit and holy challenge, which will teach you how to install new habits in your life, but also for this missing piece, this self-image piece. Because when you learn how to genuinely change your self-image, then it’s actually pretty easy to maintain whatever habit you want to maintain.
I ‘m pretty excited. Yeah. We’ve been doing this. Excited. Yeah, we’ve been preparing both these pros, I mean obviously fit and Holy has, you know, has been around for a long time. And then we just knew that pairing it with this, this self-image work that we’ve been learning about and wanting to teach you was just so, so perfect. So I want you to go to Made for greatness.co and sign up and I would like to see you on that welcome call on January 2nd. You’re gonna watch me try to change my self-identity to a person who likes moving my body every day. And I will tell you how that’s going. And we’re just really grateful for you and for this work and for the Holy Spirit who brings us all of these ideas and gives us the words to share them with you and that you trust us, that you guys trust us to lead you to a deeper relationship with the Lord so that we can grow as saints because the world offers you comfort, but you were not made for comfort, you were made for greatness.
Lorissa: (10:07) And I’m so excited that we’re doing this.
Lorissa: (14:11) Yeah, I love that
Sterling: (14:13) That’s what I’m gonna do. So,
And then every week there are two challenges. Tell us about the challenges.
Sterling: (23:38) Yeah, it’s,
Lorissa: (23:41) I dunno, it’s really tell people what they’re,
Sterling: (25:59) Yeah.
Sterling: (26:49) Yeah.
Lorissa: (29:11) Yeah, absolutely.
Lorissa: (30:18) God bless.